http://thebentaylor.tumblr.com/

The new Aol...lol

Thu, 26 Nov 2009 00:29:00 -0600

AOL is rebranding itself as Aol.

I’m on my phone so I can’t link to anything. Actually, I wouldn’t do it if I was sitting at my desktop, so Google is your friend.

The company’s new plan of attack is to make itself 1990s again. You’ll find a variety of logos featuring the new typeface ontop of clipart that’re so Windows 95.

There’s also a video that features cardboard cut out stop motion, a late 30s head banger, and kids doing stupid human tricks.

And the icing on the cake! Aol still buys pioneering technology, giving it a comfortable place to die.

Wait! Paramount!! STOP!

Thu, 29 Oct 2009 02:16:00 -0500

I should have seen this coming. Paranormal Activity makes a lot of cash, so Paramount is thinking sequel.

I guess we forgot what happens when you make a sequel to a film made in the same style of Paranormal Activity.

I saw the film the other day, and while I didn’t have the same jump back reactions like the people in the advertisements, I did find it to be unsettling.

I don’t see how you can follow up with a Paranormal Activity 2. Do we try to find the missing girlfriend and go into detail about what happened? Do we follow the demon as it haunts another victim? Electric Boogaloo? [*]

I’m not in the movie business, but that won’t stop me from thinking that Paramount should use this film as a learning tool of sorts instead of like a copy machine. Don’t place the menace with a new family. Don’t replace the ghost with an alien that happens to bother someone with a camera. It doesn’t have to be another shaky cam YouTube film quality attack from an unexplainable source. Get back to the basics. We’ve become so desensitized to the gallons of blood that are splashed about in every scene. After a while, things start to become comical.

Paranormal Activity is what a horror film should be. Explain little to keep our fear and imagination going. Show little of what hides in the dark. That’s what made Jaws and Signs the most effective, scariest movies I’ve seen. Well, Signs had me until the end where we saw the sucker standing there with the Culkin kid. But I still had trouble sleeping because the little teases kept playing over in my mind. Like the foot in the cornfield or the glimpse of the alien at the birthday party.

Basically, make a movie that plays on our fears and don’t sequalize a property to death.

Ode to Geocities

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 00:43:07 -0500

I’m really sad to see that Yahoo! shut down Geocities yesterday. Like, I’m serious when I say that. I mean, think of how you would feel if Facebook shut down tomorrow (It will in about 10 years after everyone has moved to something else). Geocities was the first Facebook to me, but it was a Facebook you had to code by hand.

I built fan sites, which got me a lot of free stuff from companies like t-shirts, CDs, and DVDs (which were$30 at the time). My inbox on rocketmail.com would reach its limit if I didn’t check my e-mail everyday. I had people asking me for help with their websites. I was a God.

It’s where I got my start.

Goodnight Geocities.

Photo

Sun, 04 Oct 2009 20:29:56 -0500

Just doesn't make sense...

Thu, 01 Oct 2009 10:41:00 -0500

A friend is have battery issues on his iPhone 3GS. I recommended that he buy a .99 cents app called iStat. This way he can kind of get an idea of what’s going on with his phone. When he went to the app’s page in the iTunes store, he asked if the app was worth it because of its two star rating.

Two stars? It’s a great app!

So I checked the page and saw that many people were upset that the Free Memory feature was removed from the app. This feature let you free up unused memory on your iPhone, and it was removed at Apple’s request. So instead of just demanding that Apple refund their .99 (the cost of a bean burrito at Taco Bell), they rate the app low too. This hurts the developer because potential buyers become instantly turned off by its two star rating, thinking that iStat is a piece of crap app.

I use it frequently to monitor my phone to see what’s going on. It preforms that function beautifully, so it clearly deserves more than two stars.

Look, a lot of people are upset with how Apple does its App Store business. I was upset to see the Free Memory removed too. Rating apps not developed by Apple low doesn’t do a thing to Apple. You’re just helping them.

iPhone flub #2

Wed, 30 Sep 2009 01:22:34 -0500

milf became… Milford. How unsexy.

Beats eharmony

Sun, 27 Sep 2009 23:22:52 -0500

I did not know that telling a girl you like about your sad dating life was a way to pick up girls. I guess your plan backfires when they tell you to check out match.com

I’m still LOLin IRL.

"She only loves me because I’m predictable."

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 11:37:57 -0500

“She only loves me because I’m predictable.”

Serious inquiry!

Tue, 22 Sep 2009 10:00:00 -0500

Serious inquiry!

I am the Paula Deen of Ramen

Mon, 21 Sep 2009 01:17:20 -0500

Seriously.

If you want to mix it up a bit and turn a cheap, bland meal into something awesome. You’ll need to do the following.

- Break up two packs of Ramen noodles and cook them.

- In a bowl, add a little bit of Olive Oil and Light Soy Sauce.

- Dump the noodles into the bowl.

- Add one pack of the seasoning. Save the second pack for later. Toss it. Whatever.

- Sprinkle some Curry Powder.

- Mix it.

- Eat it.

- Thank me later.

"A beard is the coolest accessory a man can have"

Fri, 18 Sep 2009 17:13:56 -0500

“A beard is the coolest accessory a man can have”

Ticket to rideeeee! Hehe

Wed, 16 Sep 2009 20:32:44 -0500

The Beatles Rock Band is a wonderful Disney anamatronic like ride that you don’t get to watch because you’re too busy controlling the damn thing.

Get to know your current living location, you hick

Mon, 14 Sep 2009 18:29:00 -0500

Someone thinks that you don’t see the trees turn during the fall because it doesn’t get cold enough.

I think it’s because a majority of the trees around here are evergreens.

Your 15 minutes is better spent indoors. Away from the camera.

Mon, 14 Sep 2009 00:37:00 -0500

Since when did youtube become a site where a bunch of kids, “report the news,” and spend 3 minutes of a 4 minute video begging for comments and five star ratings?

The Snow Leopard feature they don’t tell you...

Sun, 13 Sep 2009 12:01:29 -0500

The Snow Leopard feature they don’t tell you about. Segregating menu bar icons. Get to the back Last.Fm

iPhone flub #1

Sat, 12 Sep 2009 02:46:00 -0500

Because auto correct makes it interesting!

When I was asked my location, I typed “Past Cinco,” but the iPhone thought it would be funny to correct it to

Past Cincinnati

So that’s what was sent instead.

email of the day

Sun, 06 Sep 2009 13:14:08 -0500

I need to jump on this fast!

This is to inform you that your E-mail address as won you a consolation Prize of £1,000,000.00 GBP from the Microsoft Corporation sweepstakes international program. The Selections were made through a computer draw system attaching personalized email addresses to Batch numbers: 409978E and Reference numbers: BTD/968/09. Your email address as indicated was drawn and attached to a serial numbersBTD/9080648302/09 which subsequently won you £1,000,000.00 GBP (One Million Great British Pounds). To claim your prize, please contact your designated claims agent via email and sendthe following details to him for further clarifications.

FULL NAMES _ _ _ _

COUNTRY _ _ _ _

ADDRESS _ _ _ _

AGE _ _ _ _

OCCUPATION _ _ _ _

TELEPHONE_ _ _ _

Designated claims agent: Mr. Richard Carrick

Contact E-mail: richard.carrickmr@live.com

Mrs. Victoria Carter (carlito unoeste)

Microsoft Email Announcing Department

United Kingdom

Sensationalism at its finest. This is why I love the news....

Thu, 03 Sep 2009 09:37:00 -0500

Sensationalism at its finest.

This is why I love the news. They’re calling what seems to be the easiest smash and grab in the history of mankind, “spectacular.” Like, really? Apple stores are linear. There’s not much to them. They’re kinda set up like a buffet, and most of the products are, “the smallest Mac yet,” so it’s pretty easy for five dudes to smash a window and swipe all that gear. I didn’t see anyone run out with and iMac, Mac Pro or Cinema Display.

I mean, I was half expecting an Ocean’s 11 type robbery.

I will say this

Mon, 24 Aug 2009 03:43:00 -0500

I strongly dislike the Kia Rondo. It honestly looks like a rhino.

I tell my friends where it’s at in the parking lot, and that it’s hard to miss because it’s the only car out there that’s grazing on the grass.

When I want to go somewhere, I have to tranq it 30 minutes before I need to leave, so I can mount it before it wakes up.

I look like a bearded soccor mom when I drive it around.

For me this is Heaven

Sun, 23 Aug 2009 16:44:36 -0500

For me this is Heaven